Where to begin with all this. There is so much in my mind and I am just trying to make everything come together. I have been thinking and trying to come up with a decision knowing that both ways is just as hard.
During september this year I was scared of what I wanted to do. I knew that I had to try to make myself fluent in the dutch language if I still want to live here. Me and John went to check up the language courses, but it was expensive and difficult if I wasn't a citizen. It would have been different if we were married because then I could registrate myself as "family" with John.
However, was this what I wanted to do? Doing a language course? I didn't have the drive to do it, at least not for now. If it doesn't feel right, I can't do it. It's simply of how I work.
We talked about what I wanted to do, me and John. My answer was that I wanted to work and go travel for my first time alone or with a friend. But for that, I have to go back to Sweden. We both admitted that I was happier in Sweden because my family and support was closer. It was simply easier too.
It felt right, even though I knew meeting each other would be a lot harder, but I would at least follow my dream to save my money to travel.
Then everything turned different.
It was around a week ago I started to feel different again. I had just been to a friend's place and was on my way home. I was sitting there in the tram surrounded by a few people minding their own business while I was looking out the window. 'Wow, it is so beautiful here in brussels', I was thinking. It feels so excotic living in another country, it is something I really want to do. Being away makes it so special to come home too, because I love our apartment, it feels like home.
But no matter how little I like the people in Brussels and how much I want to work and travel.. it is John I am going to miss and matter the most. He is the one I want to be with in the end and I am not sure I will make it without him.
With all this I think I am taking a break from my blogging. I don't know if it will be forever or something temporary since I need to figure out what I want to do with my life. 
With this I thank all of you who have been reading (even though it was in english). It has been a fun journey and I hope I can go back to it again some day.
Over and out!

Brussels by night

Why does the sun have to go down so early?! I need the natural light to get some good photos! If there would have been snow outside I don't think I would complain so much. Thank GOD that there is streetlights ,otherways I would be completly black!
It may seem like it is bright outside, but trust me it was pretty dark at that time.

I got some new stuff

Right, so my table is filled up with stuff I got from my "mother-in-law" and I am trying to sortate all this stuff. It is so much even though it is just small containers that is samples you get from flights, stores and magazines, yet I feel so rich.
I guess when you are living a life where you have to be more cautious with your money, you start like all the small things. However living cheap can drive me nuts time to time.. 
Woooh! Some perfumes I can try out! 

Cinderella trailer

OMG! The new cinderella trailer has just came out! And wow, do I love it (especially the dress, hehe). 

Quote #17

Full disk space

It feels like the only thing I do is to sortate my computer but somehow it just refills instantly. I mean I do take a lot of pictures and it ends up being only 10 pictures that is actually worth keeping (out of 100 pics). 
Sortating pics is just the most boring thing you can do.. and I have pictures from the summer of 2013 that still remains unsortated. So unless I start taking this seriously and start sortating I guess no new pictures will be coming up.. heh.
Yeah, this was so interesting to read, I know.. ;)
1,83 GB left..


It is sunday, it is cold & rainy and I am on my period. There is no better cure for that than eating sweets, like macarons!
I purchased some yesterday by the store, curious if they are that good as they seem. And yes, they really are! I mean okay, I haven't tried the REAL ones yet that you have to buy in france but anyways..
These little things are quite sweet so one or two will keep you satisfied for a long time.

Christmas time is here

Even though it is like a month away (almost) you can feel the christmas feel in the air. Something that is missed though is the snow. Preferably I like to have a 0,5 meters of snow, -10 in the air and warm outdoor clothes. Awh, thinking about it gives me a fuzzy feeling, wanting it even more.
I guess that is what you get when you have grown up in a winter wonderland.

Working to the max

Lately I been working a lot on my laptop with photoshop, sortating stuff and other small projects.
I need to do it, just to keep my negative thoughts away. I try to think positive and let some things go - it is a struggle that I keep on "fighting" with.
That is why my blogging is so uneven, but I will still do my best to keep it up like I have planned.
Sorry that the text is so confusing, I might explain it some other day when I have cleared my head a little.

Kids and candy

It is not always easy when your parents "eats" your candy.. Luckily some kids take the news surprisingly well though.

Little mermaid inspired wedding

Me and John watched The little mermaid the other day and it felt like I went back to being a child again! Disney movies just makes me feel good and makes me wanting to try on every single disney princess outfit.
Speaking on that, I saw a couple who took inspiration from The little mermaid and made it look very magical! Hopefully my wedding will look this magical too someday ;)
For a long time I wanted to have that red hair, but now I realized it wouldn't suit me even though I find it very cool.

A cat café is finally coming over to Brussels!

Oh my GOD! In 2 weeks they will open a cat café, Le chat touille, here in brussels and let people socialize with the cats while having something to eat or drink! I have looked at some pictures of the place and the interior is not the best nor is it that big, but hey, at least you can say you have been to a cat café!  
Hopefully there will be no cat hair in the drink when you order..
Click here for the article.
Click here for their facebook page.

Sleepy cats and dogs

 We are all sleepy time to time..

Quote #16


I think I am going crazy

Yesterday I just couldn't blog because I can't sleep normally anymore when I have my rash. Let me explain how I got this.
Last friday morning I noticed how it started to itch everywhere on my body. I thought it was probably just because it is getting colder and the air is getting dryer, so I smeared some lotion on where it itched. It helped for a few hours, but then it came back. Out of insanity I started to scratch it and it start to burn, get red and get warm. I also get those bumps that you get after a musquito bite.
I tried to go through a list of the possible reasons I got this in the first place:
• I have not tried/wear new/old make-up.
• I have not washed my face with some harsh soap.
• I have not tried anything different when it comes to food (except for snails).
• I have used old sheets (and clothes) and changed to new ones.
• My skin is not dry
• I have showered
.. the list can be made long..
The only possible way this happened, that would make most sense is:
• I am allergic to something (but who knows what?)
• It is something psychological
If someone has any treatment for this, please tell me. So far I am using cold wet towels to calm my skin which helps for about 3 hours.
How I feel right now + looks kind of similar of what I have now. Now it is just on my neck and on my face (picture from mexico)